gosh!...
i never expected this to happen in my body...
seriously....

this is soo yy i never like going to the clinic...

i remember how stubborn i was...

once, i was in sec 3..
it was like a week before the final exam..
i had very high fever...
about 40++..
i couldnt lift my body..
i was bloody hot...
2 days pass yet i did even go to the clinic...
temp didnt decrease...
dad forced me up and met the doc...
and guess what the doc said...

"we have to sent u to the hospital, temp too hot" and other bull shit...
well yar i insist not to..
so he gave me antibiotics...

side track..i learn that taking antibiotics often actually causes ur normal flora to be disturb...
and that causes opportunistic pathogen( u know those disease causing bacteria)...

anyway yar i took it...
had to..
i wud prefer going to school rather than lay down at home waiting for death...

since then...
i dare not fall sick..
as in having major fever...
only minor flu, cough and sore throat...
thats all...
and not forgetting my favourite..
headaches...

so yar...it was quite long since ive when to the clinic...
till today..

for the pass 1 week...
ive been suffering quite badly...
seriously...
the pain was unbearable...
everytime i visit the toilet...
it just hurts...
and yeah...to add on to the pain...
there were blood dripping..

first time i felt it..
the blood was like damn alot...
if u were to saw it..
im sure u urself wud be scared...

but slowly it becomes just drip by drip..

slowly come to an end..
however...
didnt know it would come again...

start all over...
the pain...
then comes the bleeding..

gosh...

so cuz it brought along other problems to my body...
mom forced to visit the doc..

and yah..
couldnt take it any longer...
i when along with her decision...

the doc ask me the one and only thing that i never told strangers about...
not even my friends nor my fam..

thank god dad didnt follow me in...
or else...

she asked: "have u had any sexual intercourse?"

wow!...in all ques!...

after all the unnecessary talk..
she told me to come back for some lab test...

hmmm...
hope its not that serious...


how stupid can i be...
to actually put myself in this condition...
crazy right?

anyway...
just hope for the best...
and ill be fine after taking the medication....

oh and taking about the med...
it SUCKS!...
i wud rather drink crushed panadol dissolve in water than the solution the doc prescribe....
the taste..
omg!...
cant be describe...

thank god im suffering on my own...
well sadly cuz of my fucking behaviour...
i had to worry my parents...


to my dearest hubby:
im sorry if im not honest...
but i dont want my health prob to add on with the prob ure alrd have to face...
i know in relationship we have to share..
but ill just tell u some other time kkzz...

i love u soo much!